The perfect Sabb
The year has passed quickly. Exams are coming up, elections have been and gone, and plans for the new year are being set, yet in this avant-garde mood I thought that I would ponder over what would be required of the perfect sabbatical officer.
One might say there is little point in doing this after the actual elections, but I deem that it is necessary to have some sort of informal code of conduct that IC students should uphold in order to hold to account the SU leaders.
As such, it is reasonable to assume that Sabbs must be open, willing to talk to the common man and woman and keep the interests of the Union body at heart. However, they must steer away from actions that, although may seem popular and for the greatest benefit, will actually be known as a future harm. As such, the sabs must lead the body, even if contrary to their collective will, for that which is deemed as the ultimate goal, that which is good (do I sound epic?). This is with particular reference, of course, to the President: our representative, our protection, and our rallying point behind which we collectively fight against the plans of that evil cubical blue citadel.
If one were to think of where these Sabbs should come from, the Imperial "typicals" list is no good indicator of their potential viability. For example, the view of the typical "rugger bugger" may be that of a rugged, tough, stout personality. They would be extremely vocal for our rights, yet may on occasion lapse due to drunken nights, or recurrent bouts of venereal disease (and that's just the women).
Yet this view would be harsh, judgemental, erroneous, lacking reality, adolescent, incompetent and `typically me', so one requires a close scholarly look at the individual personality that is going for the post. One method of enquiry could be an isolated interrogation from the student body beyond a mere hustings, to a four-week daily grilling that encompasses IQ, physical endurance and personality testing with assistance from professional bodies. These are the people that are going to run the money that comes through the Union as well as hold power over a huge proportion of our student lives - you do want them to be the best, don't you? You don't want them just to be the "popular ones", do you? Any other opinion on this matter is frankly absurd.
Finally, I give particular concern to the editor of Felix. Charged with responsibility for reporting the truth, editors are often caught between a good story and a complete tell-tale. The only way to keep them on the straight and narrow when you are not around is to inspire fear in them, so that if they even think of deviating in the slightest, that fear brings them back.
I've already sent a death threat to some of the Felix staff, and I suggest you all send one too. After all, it's only illegal.
