The Sketch
Do you suffer from tense, nervous headaches? Itchy, flaky scalp? Incessant bouts of stress? I'm no medic I've somehow managed to stay sober for the last five minutes but I can easily say that if you're suffering from these symptoms, then you're suffering from a bout of pre-election tension.
Right now the whole of the union offices are in overdrive to ensure that these elections take the union into a new level of student representation. So why so stressed, you may ask? Everyone in the union hopes for a smooth election, with no fights and problems and the best possible officers being elected. To which the students reply: "Yeah, right". Even as I type, there are fears that not enough people are putting their name forward for election (to which I say: what about the poor candidates who have stood so far? Do you want them to fight a harder election? Think about their feelings, you animals!).
By the time this issue of Felix is out and in your eager little hands, the candidates would have stood forward and started to bug you for votes. This brings forth the next issue; that of voter turnout. Last year, a big achievement was reached when it was announced that a staggering (wait for it!) 25% of students voted in sabbatical elections. This was seen as quite an achievement, not only for this university but compared to nationwide union officer elections, it was also quite high.
The more astute of you might have noticed that the above turnout isn't really that great. When the turnout for the last two general elections drooped to 60% discussions arose as to whether we are getting tired of politics. So how can we boost it up?
This week also sees another staple of student life; RAG week. Yes people, it's that time again when we get an excuse to act like prats, all in the name of charity. My suggestion is, why not combine RAG and elections?
Look at it objectively. We can start off small, such as announcing the candidates from the top of the Queen's tower, to give it a sense of grandeur. Then they can all get involved in a doughnut-eating contest to gather attention. Where can we go from here? Instead of holding hustings in the JCR, get all the candidates involved in the RAG dash, and hold them wherever it ends up. Especially if it's in Aberdeen. Finalize the whole madness by letting the returning officer announce the final results, whilst running naked and proud across Trafalgar Square.
If that doesn't improve student turnout I'll eat my hat. Besides, it'll raise money for those poor impoverished kids. And you don't hate poor impoverished kids...do you?
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